You just received an angry email from your boss. No matter the subject, there are now several versions of your reply playing in your head. None of which are the correct response. Which one do you choose? None. Leave the email alone and go for a walk, lunch or somewhere quiet and let your anger subside. Afterwards, calmly reply to the email. Or better yet go knock on your boss’ door or call them. In the workplace you most always be calm and patient.
Workplace Dynamics
In the workplace, it is unprofessional to lose your temper and if it happens enough, you could lose your job. Be calm and patient with all co-workers. Maybe they are overwhelmed and need help with their workload. Try to ferret out what is the stressor. Constructive discussions with each other are the only way. No finger-pointing, name calling or ghosting. Do you really want to be that person with anger issues?
Calm and Patient with Family and Friends
Same rules apply here. If you are having a heated discussion, don’t be the aggressor. Be calm and patient. Let them say their piece and you hold your peace. Do you really want to scream at your kid? Inhale through your nose for 5 seconds hold your breath for 5 seconds exhale through your mouth for 5 seconds. Do this 5x. After that, both of you sit down at a table and discuss the issue. Listen and be quiet. No accusations or ridiculing. If you want to be the rational adult, you need to earn it.
Recognize the situation as a teaching event
If you do lose your patience, evaluate what happened. What was the trigger? What should you have done differently? Determine what you could have done better. Then go find your child who has been sentenced to life in their room and apologize. Apologizing is not giving in but recognizing that you did not handle the dispute as well as you should have. Use the event to teach your children to be calm and patient.
Up next week: Be Kind and Respectful